Today I was hurt. I allowed something someone said to get under my skin. The fact that this person is a heel and is fairly uncivil didn’t seem relevant. That he is irrelevant to me and my life and my overall happiness and wellbeing somehow slipped past me. I guess I just let myself simmer and stew in the hurt that had piled up, the pride that I’d swallowed, the ego that had been pricked before and this time there was a lump that didn’t allow me to swallow the hurt so easily. It affected me.
It doesn’t matter who said what or why and in what context. The point here is how much are we willing to let someone affect us? How much are we willing to allow bad behaviour for the sake of maintaining a relationship? How thick a skin should one grow for meanness to ricochet off the hide? How wounded can the heart get before we allow all hell to break loose? How deeply can we let our silences affect us?
I don’t know. I do know that more often than not, I justify other people’s behaviour with:
“he/she is really not so bad. Look, they’re standing by their spouses, being great parents, they’re making the most of their really bad/sad/pathetic situation. Who are we to judge? It’s not easy to be making a living with his/her partner. They know best, and they have a point, it’s just me.” And so on.
Is my justification for another’s bad behaviour justified? If I feel like having a showdown, venting my spleen, sneering them, slapping them, creating a racket, raving and ranting, I guess now that’d definitely go down in the books as “UNACCEPTABLE”.
So what does one do? Accept, reject, grow a thick skin, ignore, continue to hurt and swallow and hide the pain?
To maintain peace, yes.
To not rock the boat with people you care about, yes.
To understand yourself and your resilience, yes.
I guess true power comes not from the storm within. It comes from the calm that you can rely on when the storm rages within. It comes from certainty of knowing that you are powerful beyond belief. No one can shake you or break you. You are unbreakable. Stand tall.