I think we all have a few things that upset us right? Parents who don’t listen to what we have to say, children who’re stubborn, bosses and colleagues who’re on their own trip, friends who’re probably thinking you’re quite a dork and that really slow cashier at the check-out counter who you could shake, rattle and roll, or that lech in the train, who stares at you neck downwards (someone forgot to tell him that a woman or a person is not just tits & arse) and so on. Yes you and I we all have our pet peeves. Ever wondered why we get peeved at all and why the outcome of disagreements is usually anger leading to brooding, sulking, and just a blue funk? I personally think that it all stems from a deep-seated fear of rejection which in turn is related to self-worth. Someone or many someones somewhere told you something that in your mind meant, “I’m just not good enough!” and that was the beginning of the end of life. For there and then you and I decided to lead our lives steeped in lies. For fear of the truth. But what pray tell, is the truth?
What are the 4 questions that you need to ask that could perhaps lead you to your truth?
a) Who are you? Have you stopped to wonder what it means? 3 words that are being asked of you ad nauseam. Who are you? Are you a description of your physiognomy, or the numbers that make up our life, or the people who birthed you or the family that raised you? Who are you? Think about it. When you get an answer that is plausible, please, I plead with you, share, for I’d like to know if I could answer that query too.
b) What makes you get that buzz in your brain, that sudden giddy feeling that makes you go ‘wheeee!’ or feel that you own the world and nothing, nothing can stop you? When you sing, or connect with people or when someone acknowledges your work of art (and work of art isn’t just restricted to sketches and drawings and sculpture you know, so grow up, redefine and start taking pride in what you do, because anything you do is a work of art), or that heady sensation when you get money? What is that ‘it’? Define it. And yes, it has to be something that sustains your insides, your soul, not something momentary. Once you buy your snazzy big SUV, and have gone for a spin in it, and have received the admiring glances, c’est tout, that’s it. Then what?
c) How are you being in service to others? Now a whole lot of you may go eye-rolling in your head with this query. Service to others? bah! I want to know who is in service of me you may ask? Right. You’re done for. You are doomed to be unhappy for the rest of your life. Because the one thing I have learnt is that when you are in service to someone other than yourself, when your feeling of unbridled happiness stems from the help, service or product that you have provided, then money, success, and happiness are on a roll. The moment you start saying, ‘me, me, me,’ well, what can I say, that’s the beginning of the end.
I’ve been asking myself these questions for a while now. I know what makes my heart go thump thump thump excitedly and I know to some extent who I am. Yes only to some extent, not entirely no :). And I also know my fears. I know what I would like to do to be in service of others – one of which is trying to connect with people through this blog and start a community of people who really want to explore the questions that plague you as much as they plague me. But this whole exploration is a WIP. And it’s fun. So let’s do it together. You with me or what?
As always would love to hear from you. So go on, let me hear you. What? Louder, can’t hear you! Louder still! 🙂